Orlane Hypnotherapy Eye Cream consigned to Dept of Daft
I have Dana to thank for sending this in as a Dept of Daft candidate, for which as the “first psychodermic care for eyes in high-tech cosmetology” it most certainly qualifies. Even the name is silly. Although, thinking about it, $250 eye creams don’t just sell themselves so perhaps Orlane suspects it may have to resort to hypnosis. As I read the following about Orlane Hypnotherapy Eye Cream, I can feel my eyelids getting a little heavier and my mind drift:
“Stimulates release of neuromediators to fight against extreme stress, calms eye area from emotional shocks and brings an instant sense of well-being.”
Coming back down to earth, I wonder what does all this. Well, it’s an exclusive “Psychorepair Complex” that helps the skin “resist the harmful effects of emotions”. I’ve never really thought about my emotions aging me. And that’s a scary thought. Wait, fear is an emotion. There’s no escape from emotions and their wrinkly results. Perhaps a full-scale lobotomy is the answer.
Looking at what goes into Hypnotherapy Eye Cream isn’t exactly a stressful experience but it is a bit depressing and, as that’s probably an aging emotion, I should concentrate on the positive. Orlane has chosen sea water – got to be an improvement on tap – and after a whole bunch of things that I just promised myself not to dwell on – there’s lupine protein, which contains amino acids, and antioxidant cranberry.
Orlane makes a big deal of pumpkin and date seed extracts. You’ll find them down the list after acetyl dipeptide-1 cetyl ester. This is the real star of show in my view. Acetyl dipeptide-1 cetyl ester is a desensitizing agent, helpful given there are some potential irritants here and perhaps just what's needed against an onslaught of emotions. Orlane should play up the whole desensitizing agent thing, in my view: the first ever Lobotomy In A Jar.
Ingredients: Sea water, cyclomethicone, myristyl lactate, isohexadecane, cetearyl alcohol, cetearyl glucoside, PEG-100 stearate, glyceryl stearate, butylene glycol, ammonium acryloyldimethytaurate/VP copolymer, MICA, phenoxyethanol, titanium dioxide, hydrolyzed lupine protein, tocopheryl acetate, methylparaben, allantoin, parfum, ethylparaben, propylparaben, urea, cranberry seed oil, 2-hexyldecanol, tetrasodium edta, lactic acid, laureth-3, chlorphenesin, hydroxyethylcellulose, acetyl dipeptide-1 cetyl ester, pumpkin seed extract, date seed extract, butylparaben, isobutylparaben, potassium sorbate, glutamylamidoethyl indole, sodium methyparaben